It’s happening in my life right now - the cutting out by another - and it hurts. I know I did not do anything wrong, yet I feel guilty. I also feel angry and confused and frightened and . . . the emotions are too tangled in the story to name. You see, this person is important. This person who no longer cares to know me - she is someone I planned to be in touch with until the end – someone I would have worked it out with at all costs, despite our many differences. And I think what hurts more than anything else isn’t the fact that she’s cut me out of her life. It’s that in doing so she’s made it clear my children mean nothing to her. Not only is that unfathomable to me, it actually feels . . . unforgiveable.
And so, I keep asking myself how to behave. And I keep promising myself I’ll take the
high road, although, when I’m honest, it’s not the route I want to take. I know precisely what Jesus would do in this
situation. And the reason I know I need Him? What he would do is exactly the opposite of
what I would like to do.
Love your neighbor as
yourself.
That’s what he said and it sounds simple enough, doesn’t it?
But loving others as we love ourselves . . . that’s a big command. HUGE.
Let’s face it people – we love ourselves. If there was ever a time and place in the
existence of the universe that people have loved themselves, it is right now in
the United States of America. We are so
in love with ourselves we spend outrageous amounts of money to have the right
clothes, purses, and shoes while others mothers in other countries sell their
blood to feed their babies. We are so in
love with ourselves we pay people to do our nails, lighten our hair, massage
our bodies, build our muscles, perfect our skin. We are so in love with ourselves we share our
thoughts and feelings with anyone who will listen via Facebook and Twitter and
Instagram and meaningless blogs that allow us to think we’re sorting out the
messes of our lives in front of an audience who only roots for our success.
Love yourself? Yep. I’d say we’ve got that covered. I certainly do.
It’s the love others part we struggle with.
When Jesus said love your neighbor as you love yourself, he meant love
the stranger in front of you at the store who lingers too long. He meant love the driver who cut in front of
you in the parking lot. He meant love
the teacher who grades unfairly. He
meant love the teenager who plays loud music in the house down the street, and
the old friend who makes choices you don't agree with, and the mother at your
children’s school who does things differently from you. When Jesus said love your neighbor as you
love yourself, he meant love the child who frustrates you and the business
partner who does nothing but complain and the husband who sleeps next to you in
bed each night but has never made you feel more alone. And although I’d like to convince myself
there’s an exception to Jesus’ command to love others . . . deep down . . .
beyond the black and the dark and the sin in my heart
. . . I know I will NEVER find one.
Because when Jesus said love your neighbor as yourself, he meant love everyone
in that way, including the one who has chosen to make you an
enemy. Love her despite her anger and
accusations. Love her even though she has made you question the past and doubt the future. Love her after her words and
actions sting so intensely you fear the burn won’t end. Love her even when you are certain she will
never love you back, when she has stated that, in fact, she never loved
you back. Love her when she has verbally attacked
you in such a way you can’t stop thinking about it, because you realize that
after more than a decade of trying to follow Jesus, there is someone on earth
who doesn’t see even a hint of Him in you at all.
Love her.
And so she won’t. And yet I
will.
I will love because He loves me. And
with Him . . . love always wins.
